Personal Truth #3: External Competition is Fear-Based

Back in 2008 when I was in England, I came across the lightening-fast realization that 1) Competition is a damaging force on my self-confidence and 2) I'm really freaking competitive.

I found that I suffer from an inferiority complex. This complex is magnified enormously when I compare myself to others. And when I dig deep, I discover that my competitive nature arises out of fear. I am afraid of not being adequate, so I feel that I need to prove myself by showing that I am better than the next person.

So for the past two years, I have been trying hard to be on a strict, no-competition diet. It's damn hard. The product of my competitive nature is almost 100% sadness. I become disheartened by not being able to live up to or past the perceived expectations of others.

For now, I making a pursuit of self-development through only besting myself. I'm going to be mean, brutal, ruthless, and I will stop at nothing to win! If I of TODAY can best myself of YESTERDAY, then the trophy is mine and I can go home happy.